Wisdom 11
Imam Ali (A.S.) said:
“The most incapable of people is the one who is unable to gain true friends, and even more incapable is the one who loses the friends he has gained.”
Keywords
Most Incapable (أَعْجَزُ): The weakest, least capable, or most helpless.
Acquiring (اِكْتِسَاب): To obtain, earn, or acquire through effort.
To Lose (ضَيَّعَ): To waste, lose, or fail to preserve.
To Gain (ظَفِرَ): To attain, obtain, or successfully acquire.
Summary of Wisdom 11
This wisdom highlights two important principles: first, the value of gaining sincere and righteous friends; second, the importance of preserving those friendships. Just as wealth requires protection and careful management, true friendships also require kindness, respect, loyalty, and good character in order to endure.
Commentary
1. The Meaning of “Brothers”
The word “brothers” (إخوان) in this wisdom refers primarily to brothers in faith and genuine friends. Acquiring such companions means building relationships through noble character and virtuous conduct.
A true friend respects both himself and his companion and remains committed to the rights and responsibilities of friendship.
2. Good Character Is the Key to Friendship
Success in gaining loyal friends does not depend primarily on wealth, social status, or influence.
The true foundation for attracting and keeping sincere friends is good manners, kindness, and noble character. These qualities are the strongest means of winning people’s hearts and establishing lasting friendships.
3. Good Social Conduct Builds Lasting Relationships
Maintaining good relationships plays an essential role in forming meaningful friendships.
Simple acts of kindness—such as greeting others warmly, visiting them during times of wellness, caring for them during illness, and showing genuine concern—can develop into deep and lasting friendships.
Practical Lessons
- A sincere friend does not appear automatically. Building meaningful friendships requires effort, wisdom, and social skills. For this reason, Imam Ali (A.S.) speaks of acquiring friends rather than merely having them.
- Friendships should never be formed hastily. Before choosing close companions, we should carefully consider their character and influence. Every friend can either guide us toward the right path or lead us away from it.
- A wise saying states:
“Your friend is like the patch on your garment; choose carefully what you sew onto your clothing.”
Just as a patch should match the garment in quality and appearance, our friends should be compatible with us in values, character, and moral principles.
- Choosing good friends deserves careful thought, but preserving valuable friendships through respect, loyalty, and good conduct is even more important.
Self-Assessment
- What is the most important foundation for attracting and preserving sincere friendships?
- According to Imam Ali (A.S.), who is even more incapable than the person who cannot make good friends?
- What is meant by the saying, “Your friend is like the patch on your garment”?
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